“Dick Whittington and His Cat”

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Plot Description

Spoiler warning! Dick Whittington had often been told that London’s streets were paved with gold. So he and his faithful headed for the city. Dick quickly got a job working as a pantry-boy to Lord and Lady Hellespont. Unfortunately Dick’s cat made daily messes on the floor, which enraged Lord Hellespont. His Lordship fetched his gun and began stalking the cat through the house. Unfortunately his shot missed and struck Lady Hellespont – who’d been embracing a footman on the portico – right in the rump. The noise caused Dick to break a cup in the kitchen, for which he was beaten by the cook. When he finally escaped, he met up with the cat and Lady Hellespont in the street. They’re all about to run when Dick hears the Bells of Bow proclaim that he will be Lord Mayor of London. Before he gets too excited, Lady Hellespont points out that Bow church has a crazy vicar who’s rigged up speakers in the street to fool dim-witted country people. “Listen, you poor misguided youth,” she says. “In London no one tells the truth!” Then she says she prefers Dick to the footman she’d been embracing and suggests they team up. The cat warns him against getting involved with an upper-class female. Just then Lord Hellespont bursts from the house and shoots her in the rump again. She accuses him of doing it deliberately, but he says he’s just trying to hit the cat. Dick pulls out his sword and runs it through the Lord. The Lady is happy and again suggests that Dick come with her. The cat urges him not to succumb and the two of them head home, deciding that whoever said London’s streets were paved with gold was telling awful lies.